Just a little note

   Hey frands! I've been MIA for a while. Since school has been out I've found it hard to write. Luckily, I've found the time now. 

    I will be posting a proper blog tonight hopefully. Since I've deactivated my FB account I get a lot of nasty messages saying they miss seeing my daily funnies and pictures of the boys. I miss Facebook like CRAZY! eventually, I may  get back to it when I can learn some self control. 

   So tonight I will post a vacation blog for all of you to see the boys :) share with you FB friends if you like :)

                          Fin Frands

     

Bubba

You know that friend you've had practically your entire life? The one you tell everyone is your cousin and that you really are related. Yeah I have one of those. His name is Matt, but I call him Bubba. Why am I writing about him? Well, i've seen a lot of post on facebook lately "____ first dance" . This will be a short one but I want to give credit where credit is due and I've never shared this with anyone not even my Bubba.
        In first grade I saw him and said, I know him and it was uphill from there. We told everyone we were cousins. On the playground he would pretend to be a preacher and I would lead the choir. Recess was our time and the memories I made back then i'll cherish forever. I was in 4th grade when I went to my first school dance. I was having a blast! I was dancing to all of those fantastic late nineties hits. then a slow song came on and one by one couples lined up on the mid court line in the gym at Chatsworth Elementary. Girls with their hands on boys shoulders and boys with their hands on girls waists moving left to right. Not exaggerating when I say I was the only girl not up there. So this was the first time I really had low self esteem. My fourth grade mind was going crazy with all kinds of things. "am i ugly?" "the smelly kid is dancing with someone" "do i smell worse?" "why am I taller than all the boys" "they always pick me first for kickball, why not now?" So 10 year old little Kacey sat on the top seat, in the corner where no one could see her and shed a few tears :( My face was in my hands when someone hugged me. I look up and see my best friend, he didn't say anything just took my hand and walked me down to the floor where everyone was lined up. He just smiled at me and I felt better. This happened to me a lot. I was always friends with boys but i was never the girl with a "boyfriend" Dances would come and No one for slow dances then Matt would come dance with me. I don' care if it was out of pity. He didn't care what anyone thought and he'd dance with me. I know it may not seem like a lot to you guys, but it was friends like this that made me believe I was beautiful. He gave me confidence. As we got older I went to more dances with different guys but my Bubba always saved a dance for me.

We are 27 years old now and have been friends for over 20 years.I love this guy so much and I'm so proud of all that he has done. I'm most proud of the way he loves his family and I include myself in his family. He is good people. I love you Bubba.

look at this studd

Fin Frands

Reagan Sydney & Pierce Cameron (part 5)

This will be the final installment of the R&P saga well at least the newborn part :D I'm going to back track and jump around so stay with me :D

 after this picture was taken only parents were allowed in the NICU because of the H1N1 Virus. My mom , dad, sister, katie, and tim. were the only ones that got to hold the boys while in the NICU

Reagans first feeding from something other than a feeding tube 24 days old :D

and  first burp hehe

Pierce first bottle feeding 24 days old

That was goood! First burp :D(mini Charlie Bailey)

So this was their first feeding. the nurse said We give them 20 minutes then if they don't finish we put it in their tube. Reagan finished in 4 1/2 minutes and Pierce finished in 5 minutes :D they were ready to come home. If you've read my previous blogs you know that my boys were very healthy. They just had to grow and learn to eat :D They also had to bring themselves out of apnea spells. they would get all snuggly and comfy and say "hey this is nice lets stop breathing" we would wait a few seconds and if they didn't breath we'd give them a little nudge. We had to stop the nudging so they could go home. Just when it looked like we'd be going home they'd both be like ah breathing is for the weak boom apnea spell and they would just lay there smiling. not changing a thing. till one week :D neither boy had a spell! wooooo! so we get started on the going home process and Pierce gets a stinking eye infection :( so the boys are moved out of their co bed and into individual beds in pod 2.

After a week we were finally starting the going home process.

My first mother's day :D if all was well we'd go home the next day

Passed Carseat test!!

That night we had to stay in a care by parent room. Reagan was still hooked to a monitor that the nurses could see.  Pierces monitor was there just for our benefit. I was a nervous wreck and didn't sleep a wink. I was afraid they would have an apnea spell. We both stayed up all night watching monitors and listening to the boys breathe.

So this is where I'm sad. we lost a LOT of pictures. going home day. I have the ones from home but the ones from the hospital are gone :(

On May 11th, 2009 We made our way home to Georgia. I sat in the back between the boys. As soon as we pulled in my parents were there to greet us and for first dibs on un tethered lovins! Soon after my sister and Mammaw Katie and Pawpaw Tim came.

Nanny feeding Pierce on his first day home

Still so tiny only 4 lbs at 6 weeks old Sweet baby Rae

Exhausted! Home sweet home!

It was the best Mother's day to date! 

I left out so much but it seems like boring info to me. Maybe one day I'll go back and tell more stories from the NICU. For now I'll stop and say thank you so much to our amazing family and friends. Thank you to all of the nurses, doctors, employees at Erlanger and The Ronald McDonald House. Dont be mad at me Madisun but this is the end

Fin Frands

Reagan Sydney & Pierce Cameron (part 4) also...It's my birthday!!!

Reagan Sydney & Pierce Cameron (part 3)

       After I was released from recovery I was wheeled in my bed to a very small room. The attendant didn't feel that the group of people behind me would fit so he found a HUGE room. I was still high and very excited. It was dark outside so I'm not sure what time it was. It took them a few hours for them to get the boys set up in the NICU. After getting settled I was finally allowed to see my babies. Again, I was high from pain meds so this night is kindly fuzzy. I remember Chris pushed me in a wheelchair through the big double doors. I had to wash my hands then I was wheeled to Reagan. It was dark, I still wasn't able to touch them but I stared at my baby boy and smiled. He was wearing his little c-pap hat and had tubes everywhere. Then I was moved to the back of the pod to see my Piercey. Just as the other nurse did (which I didn't mention) Pierce's nurse lowered his isolet so I could see him. I couldn't stop smiling. They were perfect and healthy. My heart was so full of love. We had a large group of people waiting to see the boys so I was taken back to my room and given a red popsicle, I hate cherry :(, but it was the most amazing popsicle I had ever tasted. I sat in my room alone for a bit while Chris took visitors in one by one. I had time to think. I thought about how amazing God is. He gave me my precious miracles and gave me an unending peace about their health.
      After everyone saw the boys most of them went home. Our family stayed and came back to the room. I will never forget this moment. I was starving and I couldn't have anything but water, no more popsicles, nothing. In walks someone with a GIANT bag of Krystals. The smell was heavenly. They passed around food and ate, and ate, and ate. Paying no mind to me sitting on the bed salivating. My bestie Gayle pulled the privacy curtain and sat with me and made me giggle. Chris my sweet husband quit eating and came and sat with me. I wasn't mad at all. They had been there just as long as I had with no food. I finally convinced him  to eat. Everyone left and it was just me and Chris in our big room with balloons and krystals. They gave me more medicine and I passed out. No one told me they come in every hour to push on your stomach :(
      The next Morning I woke up and my nurse asked if I would like to see the boys for my first hands on. DUH I got up out of the bed while she was in the bathroom and was fixing my gowns to make sure nothing was showing. She came out of the bathroom and looked like she'd seen a ghost. " Mrs.Bailey PLEASE sit down slowly. What are you doing up?" apparently you aren't supposed to get up less than 24 hours after surgery and walk. No one told me. After i showed her i was fine she let me push my wheelchair for support to the NICU
. With Chris and nurse in tow I headed down the hall slowly. This wasn't bad at all. Walk into the NICU wash my hands and head to Pod 3. I got a lot of comments regarding my walking 13 hours after my surgery. I had my chair and I was determined to have my hands on time. So I went to Reagan first.

Reagan Sydney Bailey 2 lbs 14oz 14 inches long

Checking body Temp for the first time

First time changing Rea's Diaper

You can get a better idea of how small they were in these pictures. You can also see how hot I looked bwahahaha!

After this I very gracefully fell into my wheelchair. I felt like the whole room was spinning.

I had spinal headaches :( no fun. i felt like i might vomit. so Chris did the hands on with Pierce

Pierce Cameron Bailey 2lbs 15oz 15 inches long

First temp check with daddy

Pierce's first diaper change with Daddy

       We were both terrified. As I was changing Reagan I was checking everything. Making sure everything was in the right place. Definitely a boy...theres a hole but where is his butt? I started to cry thinking my baby was born without butt cheeks. The nurse read my mind and said "honey, he has to grow those cheeks, they'll come in soon enough" Her name was Jenna, you'll learn more about her later. We love her! It was the best feeling getting to touch my babies. I wouldn't be able to hold them for a while but this would hold me over. We did this every three hours for a few weeks. I spent 5 days at the hospital until we could get a room at the Ronald McDonald house. During those 5 days i ditched my wheelchair and saw my babies as much as possible. The boys were doing great. As you can tell from the pictures they weaned themselves off the cpap machines. a few days later they both pulled their oxygen cannulas off and were on room air. they were amazing their nurses and doctors. Day four brought a little valley. Pierce's echocardiogram came back and showed he had an open heart valve. He was not allowed to eat for thee day. They were going to try medicine first and if that didn't work we would need to discuss open heart surgery. Thankfully, one round of medicine closed it up!

         It was time to head to our home for the next few weeks Room 302. The beds were comfort select. Essentially air mattress with a remote to control the air. We were relaxing on the bed and had it at the perfect number when Allison my sister in law called. She was trying to find the RMH. In an attempt to help his sister, Chris jumps off the bed and goes to the window. Boom! my back smacked into the wood support of the bed. OMG it hurt. my stomach felt like it might rip off my body. yeah he felt bad, I cried and laughed.

      That night after the last hands on for the day we went to our room and sat on our bed. this was my first night out of a hospital bed.I guess being in the hospital masked the fact that My babies were not "with" me. I looked at my stomach, it was empty. I looked at my arms, there was no baby in them. I felt alone. This was the only time I "lost it" i ugly cried. Chris held me and I fell asleep eyes swollen and snotty nose.

To be continued...

Fin Frands

                                                                           

Reagan Sydney & Pierce Cameron (part 2)

     Okay, I was going to wait a while before I wrote this part but a LOT of people asked that I do part two today. Where were we? Oh yeah going 90 mph up I-75 at 3am. I was scared initially but by this time I was just wondering if my boys were going to be ok. When I'm nervous I awkwardly try to be funny. When we arrived to the hospital The EMT's took me to the wrong floor so they wheeled me onto the elevator. I looked right at Chris and say "geeze babe, you could have brushed your hair" I was joking but he was serious and started to explain he didn't have time blah blah blah. he looked like he might cry so I had to tell him I was kidding. We finally make it to L&D, the EMT's helped me off the gurnee. At this time all I'm wearing is a hospital gown and I feel the breeze. Here comes the awkwardness. I look at the two male EMT's and say "Guys its been nice, but I'm upset you got to see my naked butt and I didn't even get dinner." They laughed, I hope because they thought it was funny but probably because they felt sorry for me.
      I was hooked up to all kinds of monitors, given a catheter, and told not to get out of bed. I was also put on Magnesium Sulfate to help stop my pre-term labor. If you didn't know, this stuff SUCKS. I wasn't allowed water or ice chips because at anytime they might need to take the boys. this Magnesium stuff made me feel like I had the flu. It made my mouth dry out so bad that my tongue and lips were cracking and bleeding. Lets not forget the contractions. The doctor said mine weren't registering because they were so strong. So without my consent I was given high doses of pain meds.  I also had to be given steroids to help build up the boys lungs. (this went on FOREVER) I was passed out from the pain meds and would only wake up when I had a contraction. They wanted to keep the boys in there at least two more days and since I was only dilated a 1/2 cm they seemed hopeful. I knew that wasnt gonna happen.
      Did I mention I was wearing nothing but a gown. SO many people came to the hospital. I was very grateful but I was also very naked.  passing out, nip slips, and nurses coming in messing with my vagina. My dad was on his knees praying the whole time, my mom was on one side of me and chris was on the other holding my hand through contractions . Katie, my mother in law, was crying and praying and crying :D I could give you the details of the next 13 hours but frankly I was passed out through most of it.
      I was hurting extremely bad so the sent the doctor and she checked me. Still 1/2 cm. I pass out. I was up screaming from the pain and my Mom is holding my hand. I freak out "I love you Momma but where is Chris" She gives me that Im sorry look and says "Katie is taking him home to get some clothes since the doctor said it would be a while" I scream " THEY ARE COMING NOW" Momma gets ahold of them, there were just a couple of minutes away and were turning around. she tried to calm me down but I pitched a fit until the Doctor came. The Doctor looks at me and with the ugliest attitude said " I was just in here 15 minutes ago and you are only 1/2 cm" I keep my calm and ask God to hold my rage at bay " Check me again, now..please" She checks, looks at me and says "honey you're right, you are at 9 1/2 cm lets meet these boys" I pass out. I wake up and there are a few men in the room. they are they neonatal doctors. I'll condense their schpiel into this "Your babies will not be breathing, you will not hear them cry, you won't be able to see them, they will need to be put on a ventilator, and will stay in the NICU until at least their due date. While in the NICU they will most likely have to have multiple blood transfusions and possible surgeries." Everyone was crying. God had given me incredible peace. I wasn't worried at all. The nurses came in and got me ready for my emergency c-section.

My sweet husband letting me break his had before I headed in to surgery.

   I was set on what looked like a 2x4 my nurse was the size of a popsicle stick and i was told to lean on her for support. I told her I might break her. The anesthesiologist told me he was going to stick the needle in my back and need be to be very still. As soon as the needle touched my back I had a contraction. He told me how awesome I was for not moving during my contraction while a needle was in my spine. Oh thanks Doc, i really wanted to jump and be paralyzed.. They laid me down on the 2x4 and stretched my arms out beside me . I told them I felt like Jesus. (why must i say these things) They brought Chris in and started cutting. In this very small room with me I had two doctors, two anesthesiologist, My two nurses, a team of four for Reagan, a team of four for Pierce, a class observing my cesarean and Chris. I was high as a kite Chris watched as they cut me open. Then before i know it I hear the sweetest thing. Reagan was born at 5:24pm screaming with his strong little lungs. I hear a nurse say "Oh my gosh he has red hair!" They bring him up to see me, he was beautiful. Another sweet cry 30 seconds later and Pierce was born at 5:24pm also. "oh my gosh they both have red hair!" Pierce is brought over so I can look at him. His little mouth wide and screaming. my Gorgeous boy. My heart was about to bust with love. i remember my cheeks hurting from smiling so big. Chris kept kissing me and holding my face. 

        So they had already proved the doctors wrong with their powerful lungs which allowed me to see my babies before they took them to the NICU. I was sent to recovery where lots of people who I dont really remember came to see me . I do remember this though. Chris had somehow gotten blood on his pants and the anesthesiologist pointed it out and said "is that blood?" to which I replied " It's merlot" i was still kind of high. He laughed and said "Did you just quote Superbad?" yes I did, because i'm cool like that so I just shake my head yes "you're awesome" he said. Yeah I know. I know you wont like this but I'm stopping here . There will be a part three soon! thanks to everyone for the support! Subscribe!

                                                                          Fin Frands

Reagan Sydney and Pierce Cameron (part 1)

As I sit here, no sleep to be had, I look at my sweet boys. They are both sick right now. Ive been up all night changing cool cloths,rubbing bellies, and the oh so glamorous, emptying puke buckets! I wouldn't trade it for all the money in the world! I thought today would be a great day to write about my pregnancy and how the boys came to be. This may bet a little wordy and maybe a little tmi =D

           I had been married a whopping 2 months when I found out I was pregnant. So what Kacey. Well here's some tmi. I was taking birth control, never missed a day, taking it at the same time everyday, and using other forms of protection. Move over Fertile Mertile, I had been sexually active a whole 2 months and boom that blue plus sign was screaming at me. I took the test in my church bathroom hoping my prayers to God would be heard better. They went a little like this "God, I want children, eventually, just not now. Please, please, please let this be bad PMS and a virus!" As soon as I so gracefully peed on that stick the plus sign showed. I sat there for a good twenty minutes. Chris was waiting outside. I yell from within the bathroom. "um, babe"...
         Lets fast forward to ten weeks later, the night before my first ultrasound. I'm sitting in my living room with my pregnant best friend Tippi. I might want to mention at this time that Tippi was expecting twins. Something I had told her since she found out. So here we are, sitting on my couch when Tippi crouches down to my belly and says "hello my little babies, I don't know if you're girls or boys but I know there are two of you. Mommy doesn't think so, but I know" She was crazy. I have no history of twins in my family, do  I? The whole way to the my checkup the next day I was pleading internally "please be one, I know its two, but please be one" Chris kept asking if I was ok and I shook my head afraid to voice my fears out loud.
        A very sweet tech named Andrea started my ultrasound. As soon as the picture came on the screen I see two round things and I ask "um, is that two?" to which she enthusiastically replies " oh my goodness, yes, you caught it before I did" this is what went through my mind and also came out of my mouth "OH CRAP" "OH NO" "OH CRAP" Then I hear chuckling, then laughter. My husband is thrilled and just laughing his tail off at me freaking out.

I guess I looked like I might pass out in the lobby, strangers were holding my hand asking me if everything was ok. All I could say was "there's two" I called everyone, saved Tippi for last who said " if you are lying to me I will never be your friend again" Chris was grinning from ear to ear. at this point I'm still in shock and would stay that way for the day.

24 weeks here

       My nerves finally calmed down and I was beaming with joy. I threw up everyday at least twice and cried because I thought I thought I was too fat for Chris to feel them move. I was dumb, he could feel them. I was 17 weeks when I found out I was having two boys. I was so excited and relieved. God knows I couldn't handle two girls. My Momma was overjoyed. She had always wanted a little boy and now she would have two grandsons. I loved being pregnant! I was loosing weight and feeling my boys move was the most amazing thing I have ever experienced.

       I has just turned 28 weeks when we registered at a few places and picked out paint for the nursery. My Daddy decided to cook for me on March 31st. I hadn't really been able to eat much but this day I felt I could eat a horse...and a pig.  I felt like I had hiked up Mount Everest and my butt was going to fall off. The pain did not stop me from eating a huge steak, baked potato, and salad. Then My moms steak and potato =D It was so nice being able to eat with out two heads digging into my rib cage.

        Late that night Chris was in his study and I was scarfing down Life cereal. Where did all this room come from? I noticed it was just after 1am meaning it was April Fools day.I got up and headed towards the study.Half way there I thought better of screaming "MY WATER BROKE!" didn't want to jinx myself, geeze. I headed back to bed and watched PBS. Chris came in the bedroom about 2:25 got ready for bed turned off the TV. He kissed me and said goodnight. I roll over and no joke, as soon as I do this my water breaks. I sat straight up and screamed "MY WATER BROKE" to which Chris replied "Are you sure?" I wanted to punch him. I jumped up, got dressed, and put my hair up. I look at Chris and he is standing in the same spot, frozen in his boxer briefs. He looks at me and says "What do we do!?!?!" I had to laugh after telling him to put clothes on. 

          After getting in the truck (it was pouring rain btw) I call my mom then L&D. I didn't realize till now that I was violently jerking. I was very scared and nervous. I was only 28 weeks. I called Chris's Stepdad and he hung up on me thinking I was joking. everyone else I called believed me and headed up to the hospital. I called Tim (fatherinlaw) back and said "i'm not joking, my water broke and we are headed to L&D"

    They checked me out and put me in an ambulance to Erlanger. I think I'll end this here to be continued later.                                                        

                                                                    Fin Frands