Something I never thought I'd do

Most of you have known me for a very long time. When most people describe me its always the same HAPPY, SWEET, HAPPY, CARING,HAPPY. I am a happy person. I mean look at my boys, how could I not be? What I'm getting at is I was always that happy kid and I was also always the chunky kid. My weight has never bothered me. I am married to the love of my life who uplifts me daily. My parents never talked negatively about my body. Positive body image CHECK! I have it. Im not depressed because I weigh 330 lbs. I am ready to change it though for my boys. I want to be here with them as long as possible and if I can prolong my life by being healthier then thats what I'm going to do. I don't have a weight loss goal. I do, however, have a goal to run a 5k.  I want to be able to run the whole thing without stopping and feeling great about it!Another goal is to have my uplifting Husband, actually lift me up :D it will happen! I don't know how i'm going to get there but I will. I've realized I have to do it, no one else can make me but me. I know i'll have all the support in the world. I'm asking you guys to keep me in check! Short blog but I needed to do this so I can hold myself accountable. I almost posted some before pictures but I'm not really ready to share those.Instead I'll share these which show my flub but under clothes :D

Thanks for reading!

Fin Frands

The red-headed stud that started all these shenanigans

      Well it's been a minute...This will be the story of  how Chris and I became an "us" <3 Barf.

         I want to start at the beginning, not because its fantastic, but it started this way. I was in 10th grade choir and was sat next to my soon to be bff Jessica, whose boyfriend was Chris. Oh no Kacey! You didn't? How could you! Just hear me out.
        .
        He thought I was a boy before we met because everyone still called me Charley back then. We spent a great deal of time hanging out and such with a group of friends from church. Chris and I became friends. I had no romantic feelings toward this ginger what so ever.
        Weeks passed, summer came, and they broke up. I was a great bff! Sleepovers, grapes/watermelon, and crazy immature fun! I also shunned my new friend Chris for the sake of my bff Jess.  My Momma missed him coming over to the house. I didn't worry about it though. He was cool but Jess was like a sister to me so it was nothing to drop that friendship for her. A few month later Jess encouraged me to talk to him, our parents had became bff's so going to his house was inevitable, so I did. He was a great friend we talked on yahoo messenger and hung out with the old group again. We had a pretend wedding with Jess officiating. After this he suggested we go on Husband and Wife dates. I was all for it! We had so much fun just hanging out, did I mention he was a great friend. In my mind that's what he was, a friend. We went to places like the movies, swinging at the playground, and walmart :D. He came to my house watched movies and hung out with my Momma. Oh no! I was falling for him. I can't like him, Jess will hate me. So quit hanging out with him.It hurt so much to think I would hurt my best friend
    It wasn't long after this Jess,without me knowing, had a convo with Chris. Chris is a VERY private person. She asked if he liked me "Sure, I like everyone" blah blah blah. after much prodding from Jess he finally said "yes, I like Kacey more than just a friend" WHAT! this was news to me but I must hide my admiration! Jess then went on to say that she knew we were meant for each other. She asked me if I liked him, I couldn't lie to her. Who got the wheel moving? Jessica (thank you girl! I am eternally grateful) He started coming over again. I still doubted that he liked me more than a friend until he held my hand. Then when I wasn't looking he was very sneaky and kissed me. Blush*aww *mush. December 11th, it was getting late and he had to be home so I walked him outside it was FREEZING! He stood there FOR-EV-ER looking up shuffling his feet and being all fidgety. He grabbed my hand looked into my eyes and said "What are the chances of a boy like you and a girl like me taking this relationship a step further" Kacey was very confused. This was a reference to his favorite movie Dumb and Dumber (my mom never let me watch it) so I reply with a super confused look on my face" ummmm good??" We laughed (mushy stuff) then said our goodbyes, it was past his curfew. I'm sure i'll finish the story of my lubba and me later but this is all for now.

Fin Frands

Ugh Snow

I ,KaceyB, LOATHE snow. Yes it's beautiful to look at, but I hate it. I don't like it when it's cold, wet, and nasty. Give me sun and flip flops any day! Well that was it about that. I'm still getting use to blogging. I'm not the best at it. Thank you all though for reading and for the encouragement. I also what to thank my sister for being my critic and telling me what I did wrong. She doesn't sugar coat and I love that about her <3
                                               So today I want to talk about my boys

They are my life, I would do anything for them. I'm a Momma and proud of it. One day I'll talk about their adventure coming into this world. Today I just want you to know how awesome they are. 

This is Reagan. He is my mini me :D Colored up like his Daddy but looks like his Momma. He loves tomatoes, Power Rangers, and his cat Rhubarb. If you ask him, he works at the dollar store and when he grows up big like his Daddy he wants to work at Big V. He is my accident prone baby. He knocked his head on everything during his new found walking and climbing abilities. He's had the tip of his finger severed and most recently I busted his head while opening the car door. He loves to learn. Shapes, patterns and math are his favorite subjects. His imaginary friend is his Grandma and her dog. Very morbid tidbit, but they (the imaginary Gran and dog) die every week. He's can be a complete turd. However, after being a turd he feels bad and tries with everything to make his wrong right,

This Is Pierce. He looks just like my husband and my Momma. He unfortunately acts just like his drama queen Momma. He loves to loves tomatoes, Power Rangers, but he isn't a huge animal guy. He makes up the best songs and stories. He has a big heart and hates to see other hurt. His brother will hit him or something, Pierce will tell on him. This leads to Reagan getting in trouble, crying, and being comforted by Pierce. His favorite people in the whole world are his Bff's Aven and Jace. His imaginary friends change from day to day. He loves to dress up as super heroes. He always want to help me cook. His favorite part of school are girls, dancing, and patterns. Lord does he have a temper not a red headed temper but a Kacey Charles temper :D

These boogers keep me in stitches with their constant knock knock jokes and outrageous stories. I usually have some sort of dragon or monster in my room. My house is always full of laughter. If you follow me on Facebook you get my accounts of what comes out of their precious mouths. Is it ever quite or clean in the Bailey house? Nope :D 

They both have the most amazing imaginations. They always pretend to be a character from a book or movie. Gender doesn't stop them. This is where I get all Momma Bear, I'll cut you if demean my children for playing make believe. I have had friends and family tell R&P they need to pretend to be a boy. They pretend to be who they want. They don't think, ah lets stir up trouble . All they care about is how awesome that person or character is. I will not tell them to pretend to be something else. I do not want them to have any negative connotations with women. I want them to see people's hearts not their gender. I've heard it all "your messing him up" "they are going to be gay when they grow up" "if you keep letting this happen they are going to be confused" My boys will be loved by their Dad and me. Unconditional and unfailing love no matter what.

Whatever my babies grow up to be, I will always be their mother. I will be there with open arms full of love. This is what I'm made to do

Momma (possibly my longest and most depressing blog)

My sweet, adorably short Momma. No person on this earth has loved nor ever will  love me as much as she did. I can say this without doubt now because I'm a mother. My sister and I were her world, she was a very needy person she constantly needed someone to love her. Kelly and I filled that spot with ease. We were never allowed beyond our yard for the fear of someone taking us or hitting us with their car. Our world was semi perfect in that she did everything to never let anyone hurt us. My sister was cripplingly attached and had panic attacks when away from Momma. 

I said in my first post, she was the most selfless person I have ever known, she was also the most compassionate. She never taught me how to put on makeup or be super girly, that wasn't her thing. What I did learn from my Momma was to love unconditionally. I watched her take care of her Mother and Father while they were sick. My Franny Betty was diagnosed with ALS/Lou Gehrig's disease in 2007. My momma and daddy moved in and took care of her until her passing four short month later in October 2007. She lost her sister, one brother, father, and mother all too soon. It hurt so much to see her go through each of those.

   I was married the next summer in 2008. Momma was so excited and sad. I would be leaving her and moving in with my husband. She helped me get ready, calmed my nerves and held me. Lord did she love  Chris. She couldn't be happier with my hubby :D She insisted on many occasions that she married him first and i couldn't have him,hussy. Two whole whoppin months later and I find out I'm pregnant. Talk about the most excited woman in the world, she was the first person I told. I thought my momma might do a back flip and pee her pants. She went to Dr's visits with me, took care of me when I was sick. It was awesome having her there for my pregnancy. My boys came very early, she was there every step of the way.

First hands on with Reagan

First time holding her babies

She was made to be Reagan and Pierce's Nannie. She and my sister watched them when I went back to work.  During this time she had a lot of problems with what we thought was carpal tunnel. It got to where she couldn't hold the boys without someones help. It broke her heart. She started losing weight and refused to believe that it was something worse. we would find out later that summer of 2010 that she, like my Franny Betty, had ALS. She went from the chubby cheeked Nannie above to skin and bones in no time

She still insisted on wearing her 3x shirts hehe

Als is a horrific and terminal illness. She lost all control of her muscles. By 2011 She had to use a wheelchair and had trouble speaking. She got very sick that June after a rough bout with Septicemia we almost lost her but she was stubborn and wouldn't have it. She came home to her babies :D

August 13th, after days of holding on, our precious Momma passed away. My daddy was right by her side. Worst day of my life. I wanted to say that I was happy she was no longer in pain and no longer suffering, I really was. The truth is I was incredibly selfish. I didn't want her to go. I didn't have enough time with her, 24 years was not enough. It still isn't. It's going on 3 years and it still hurts. My sister will be getting married this year; it breaks my heart to know she wont have my momma like I did. DEPRESSING sorry :D  It won't be as long and depressing next time. I loved my Momma and miss her everyday. She was my best friend

Fin Frands

Why not.

My name is Kacey.
 

 I'm a horrible writer, so enjoy :D My grammar and punctuation are hardly on point. This is my first blog. Everyone else has one and I enjoy reading them. So why not?

 I came into this world in 1987 to two completely selfish people.

   
My parents were babies themselves and still had no idea what they had gotten their selves into.


 

 Look at that stache and fro :D my mother was 20 and my dad was 22. they had been married 4 years when I arrived. Somehow through much hurt, misery, and infidelity they had a long and successful marriage. Please don't take the above comments as condemning my parents or calling them unfit. My Momma was the most selfless person I've ever known. She made some bad mistakes but was the best mother. My Daddy, well he is one of a kind. He too made awful mistakes but I never questioned his love for me. They were married 28 years and I was around for 24 of those years. My parents marriage was tough but persevering. I have never seen love like theirs.

I mean look at this! This was 2 years ago when my Mom was very sick and at one point on life support. ( I'll save the rest of that story for another blog)They were/are my shining example of love conquers all. So this was an intro to Moi. I love answering questions and talking about my amazing family. That will probably be the extent of this blog, me rambling about my fam :D How do you end these things? Do i need a catchphrase? How about Fin.